Sunday, May 30, 2010

Hey, I'm just here bored and got a lot of things to do...Umm where to start, where to start....Well got summer school next week। Sucks only get a week off of school then BAM summer school! But hey look on the bright side i get to see my boyfriend and i get Fridays off. Got a lot to think about and to do but only two months to get it done in time!! Pulling my hair out now!!

Thursday, May 27, 2010

30 seconds to mars- the kill


Thursday, May 20, 2010


Break down....

So much has happened and just full of drama i guess. Well my ex boyfriend surprised me today at school and it was a shocker. I'm still shaken up. I was walking with my boyfriend and i heard my name was being called but i didn't know who it was. I thought it was just my friend messing with me and i thought oh ill talk to him later so i kept walking and i heard a lot of people calling my name...I turned and saw a group of people and my eyes went straight to my ex and i was waving before i saw who was calling me and my hand just dropped and so did my heart. He looked at me in my eyes and i looked in his but he was far and i turned back and kept walking as my body just shut down and my brain just went blank.

My boyfriend asked me if i wanted to talk to them my friends that were calling me and i said " no" without thinking.

"No its Ok. go talk to them." My boyfriend replied.

I said "OK" and he waited there and i walked a little more and my Ex and his friend were walking towards me they were holding hands. When they reached me they let go and went kind of a part leaving space between them.

"Hey. I came because of her." he said looking at the girl he was with. They were going out?? I didn't care about that i was too worried about my body and the feelings i was having right then and there.

When he said "ill tell you later." meaning he would tell me what later?? I don't know. But he said i had a nice shirt and it was really awkward. I asked if i could get a picture of him and pulled out my camera

"No not by myself. you take one with me." He backed away a little.

"Ok" I replied and had his friend take the picture of us.

"I don't know how to do this." he said before we took the picture.

Saying that he didn't know how close he should be or if he could put his arm around me since my boyfriend was inches away and i was his ex and maybe not in front of his girlfriend?? We just got close and the first picture his friend told him to do something funny and boy it wasn't funny..he was looking down at me staring at me like he was in love with me as i looked at the camera smiling. The second one he was looking at the camera and smiled and so was I.

Afterwards he said bye and we walked away i couldn't look back it was too hard. All I could think about was him after and that's all I can think about now. My body just felt all shaky and nervous and tickling inside. I never felt like that ever. Only when i was dating him. Maybe that's why i loved him...I felt like crying because seeing him is different then texting. Seeing him was like it was real. My body wants him every thing in body was like it went haywire and my heart belongs to my boyfriend. But i Hate my ex for doing that to me. For showing up at of no warning or anything and i hate him for making me feel like this. When I just got over him, when me and my boyfriend are finally good again. But deep inside of me was shocked to see him and happy like i wanted to grab him and hug him so tight not letting go..but my boyfriend..

So now I'm home and freaking out still well I'm texting my ex and I'm still shaken up and I can't stop wanting to just stare at the pictures we just took.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

The wicked witch! just with a B

OH my gosh I'm so fucking pissed right now.Thought blogging would help that because nobody reads this anyways so whats the point.OK back to me being pissed a lot of drama. Well my boyfriend hates my close friend Victor and well my friend is not to fond of my boyfriend Rick. Anyways two days ago i was joking around with my friend and well people misconstrued me and my friend as flirting so this BITCH girl that happens to be my boyfriends friend Veronica the bitch which i like to call her! She takes a picture of us meaning me and my friend messing around (not a very good picture! you can't even see anything) well she showed my boyfriend and lets just say he was the lest bit happy! He was a ticking time boom ready to go off any second.

He wouldn't even let me hug him or anything. Well i reached to grab him he said "DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!"
We both left angry that day! We made a promise he wouldn't talk to her again and i wouldn't ever touch my friend like that ever!
Today i was so pissed i wanted to know why she did it and i was determined to find out!
She didn't come yesterday which i was going to talk to her.She showed today pretending shes better than anyone! Witch people just call her a slut! which is true! Anyways i walked out of my math class where she was sitting on the floor whoring around...I ask her friend if i can talk to the bitch alone and so she gets up and the bitch looks up "yes?"
"you know what."
the Bitch says "No what?"
Me:" the pictures. Its none of your business!"
well we start aguring and she was like yes it is his my friend and i say his not your friend he doesn't even care about you! She starts yelling and people can hear her annoying voice down the hall and kids are standing out of their classes hoping for a fight! while people keep going in and out of our math class hearing everything and i rather just die and hope she ends up in hell!

A teacher comes out of a near by class and asks whats going on and we both say nothing. The teacher says i heard yelling and i was going to call security.She asked what class we had and bitch said this class and i was just working outside and then she asked me and i said the same i was just talking to her. The teacher knows the bitch from a class before and says bitch was being loud and they could hear her in the teachers class and i said i was just talking. This is the best part...the teacher says yes she was talking but you were yelling and the bitch says you know me i project my voice and I'm very sorry.
After the teacher leaves we begin talking again i tell her just stop talking pictures of me it none of your business and she says i wont if you stop flirting and I'm like why did you? do you like victor is that it? and well it ends in me saying just stop and shes like what if i wont then i say if you don't then you'll find out! i open the door and i hear say shes being a bitch....
I honestly don't care what a bitch has to say about me she is nothing she is just a slut!!!!
Later me and my boyfriend got in a fight because of this. She told me he told her to make sure i don't flirt and if i did to show him. when we got down stairs he trys holding my hand not even a second i thought i could do it but i cant yank my hand away and say i just cant and his like why? whats wrong? i tell him i need to calm down i cant right now. He says tell me and i tell him what the bitch said that he told her to take pictures. He looks at me and says "what no i didn't and says my friends being telling me you flirt with him and asked me if your going out with him. I never told her anything! That day i texts you to come outside she was saying I'm stupid for waiting outside for you when you in there flirting with him!"
He doesn't even stick up from me not even his-self! i want him to but i guess he won't! Even though i stick up for him all the time and he can't even for me or his self!